Thank you for staying with me in this series. Please be aware today’s post is interactive!  We will work through one of the common struggles related to parenting a prodigal child.  As mentioned in a comment last Monday, it is often the case that we dwell on what we did to make our child behave this way.  (If you missed it, read it here.)  That post points out that the enemy’s lies are at the root of the issue.  But it is also true that we as parents are not perfect.  There are many things I wish I had done differently in raising my children: influences I would have fought harder to protect against, moments of harshness instead of love and grace. I could easily go on and on.

As humans, we have two common responses when we are reminded of our failures. Sometimes we become defensive, excusing or denying our actions, placing the blame on someone else, or pointing out that another person is more guilty than we are. Other times, we come to believe that we are incapable of change or unworthy of forgiveness.  But there’s a better way.

In Exodus 34:6-7, Moses is standing in the cleft of the rock while God declares his name.

The LORD passed in front of Moses, calling out, “Yahweh! The LORD! The God of compassion and mercy! I am slow to anger and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.   I lavish unfailing love to a thousand generations. I forgive iniquity, rebellion, and sin. But I do not excuse the guilty. I lay the sins of the parents upon their children and grandchildren; the entire family is affected— even children in the third and fourth generations.” (NLT)

Often when I encountered this passage, I focused on the concept of the sins of the parents being laid on the children and grandchildren. I completely ignored the part about unfailing love to a thousand generations, and I paid no attention to the forgiveness of iniquity, rebellion, and sin.

There is no question that I suffered for the sins of my parents, and that my children suffered for mine.  You can probably say the same.  But the good news is that in our generation, we can break the chain of suffering and turn instead to receiving God’s unfailing love, for ourselves, our children, and a thousand generations of grandchildren.

How? Examine what God says he forgives: iniquity, rebellion, and sin. These words have three distinct meanings in Hebrew. Briefly, the word used for sin means missing the mark, not achieving what we aim for.  Iniquity refers to twisting something good for our own selfish reasons. And rebellion (the same Hebrew word is often translated transgression) is a willful breaking of trust or relationship.  Take a few moments to consider an instance of each of these in your own life, either in your relationship with God or in your relationship with your prodigal child. Please don’t move on until you have identified these examples.

Now, rejoice! Praise God!  Give thanks to God for his indescribable gift!

He was wounded for our transgressions, bruised for our iniquities;
The chastisement for our peace was upon Him,
And by His stripes we are made whole.
We all like sheep have gone astray;
We have turned, every one, to his own way;
And the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all…

He bore the sin of many,
And made intercession for the transgressors.

Isaiah 53:5, 6, 12b

Jesus offers forgiveness as a free gift.  He bore our sin, our iniquity, and our rebellion/transgression. And not only ours, but our children’s, also. But to truly receive forgiveness, we must forgive our enemies, our children, and ourselves.

In Mark 11, Jesus gives two fantastic promises:

“Whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

It is absolutely essential both to forgive and to be forgiven. Unforgiveness allows the enemy a stronghold in our lives. In the words of Nelson Mandela, “Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”  While he was paying the price for our sins and the sins of the world, Jesus asked the Father to forgive the very people who were crucifying him. He can help you forgive, and he can help you receive forgiveness.  He gives so much joy through this process!  It truly sets us free.