Are you new to walking this unequally yoked journey? Did you search the Internet and stumble upon our website? Every week new readers arrive here looking for help. They are seeking suggestions, wisdom and practical instruction on how to deal with tithing, raising kids in faith, standing strong in their marriage when they feel fragmented because of differing faith beliefs.
You may be puzzled as to why Dineen and I write and share instruction about growing in our faith. You may wonder why I’ve spent a month talking about prayer when you need to know if you should ask your husband about giving to church. Well, my friends, Dineen and I have walked this unequally yoked road for 25+ years. And out of our year in and year out experience we have learned a foundational truth about thriving in an unequally yoked marriage.
Are you ready? This is it: When we grow in our faith life our earthly life becomes easier. Life with our spouse becomes more peaceful. Living on planet earth in powerful faith makes the difference in every positive and hopeful way in all aspects of relationships and living.
That is why I’m spending so much time in developing our prayer lives. When we pray with the prayer strategies I’ve covered, you bring heaven into your home, marriage and life. (You can search the archives for practical advice on all issues related to being unequally yoked. I’m pretty sure we have written about all of them multiple times. *grin*.)
We have covered many aspects of creating a powerful prayer life. But today I want to chat about what we do with our confusion and disappointment when our prayers remain unanswered. And specifically, why isn’t my spouse saved?
Gang, as I mentioned my husband and I have been together for more than 25 years. I have prayed, pleaded, bargained, begged and everything and anything else to convince God to save my husband. And save him yesterday, already.
Anyone else in this place with me???? Anyone????
Well, there are a few things to bring before the Lord when you are praying and not receiving an answer. We first must ask, “Am I praying within the will of God?”
This is an easy question and one that is also difficult. When it comes to God’s will to save our spouse, the Word is clear. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. -2 Peter 3:9 (NIV)
So, you gotta wonder, if I’m praying with sincerity with a heart full of love and hope, and within the Will of my Father, WHY IN THE WORLD ISN’T THIS MAN SAVED?
Yep, I know I’m not alone in asking this question.
Here are my thoughts. I believe the Word and that I AM praying in faith and conviction using my will. Thus God sends me to this statement in His Word:
The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. He then brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household.” -Acts 16:29-31 (NIV)
My friends, I believe that my husband will be saved. My husband has already been sanctified (made holy) because of my faith in Jesus. If you read our book, Winning Him Without Words, you will remember my story of my husband praying the prayer of salvation with Joe on our driveway.
So…… It has been accomplished. I will live believing that God will honor His Word and that my husband will find his way to heaven. However, right now my reality is that my husband is not living for Jesus.
I’m bummed out about it all. My husband is missing so much that God has for his life. So much blessing, wonder, adventure and peace. Our marriage has missed out on many things that I truly have wanted to share but didn’t because of our faith differences. These are sacrifices I have laid down on the altar of love for my Savior.
I know that like me, you are also laying down many of your hopes about your marriage on the altar. But, I will be the voice to tell you that all we have laid down, God will pour back into our lives in other ways. Now and into eternity.
What is difficult for us is that God’s timing is not our timing. God’s ways are not our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9). And we have such great difficulty surrendering our expectations and timelines. Sometimes I think the best prayer we can pray for our spouse’s salvation is this:
Lord, have your way with me. I surrender all my expectations and limitations. Fill me with your wisdom and revelation. Place contentment within my spirit and supernatural love in my heart. Let me turn my eyes fully to you and believe without doubt, you have my utmost best and greatest plans and intentions for my life, family and marriage. I trust you and will live intentionally to draw near to Thee. In Jesus name. AMEN
Today, let’s become “lay-down lovers of Jesus.” Let’s turn our face fully toward Him and allow His love to fill our hearts and trust Him to fulfill His Word toward our spouse and children.
In the comments, write your spouse’s name, children’s name and follow it by 1 Corinthians 7:14 & Acts 16:29 as a statement of faith. I’ll start us out.
Mike, Caitie, Brad and granddaughters – 1 Corinthians 7:14 & Acts 16:29. They are sanctified and saved. It is written. I believe. It is done. In Jesus name. AMEN
I love you my friends. I’m praying for your family in the comments. In His Grace, Lynn
Next posts: The blocks of prayer.
Essential components of effective prayer:
- Create a time and space devoted to Bible reading and prayer.
- Use the Word of God in your prayers.
- Believe – Hebrews 11:6
- Engage you Will.
- 1 Corinthians 7:14
- Thankfulness & Worship