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Reader Question: How Do I Respect Him

Today I'm tackling another reader question:

Lynn,

Hi there, thanks so much for getting back to me.  I am worried because I feel that my marriage is more than just spiritually mismatched--it's all around mismatched.  Somehow, during a period of rebellion apparently, I got myself into a marriage with a man whose core values I don't agree with.  The best way I can think of it is being in an arranged marriage.  I know arranged marriages work sometimes so I need to find out how.  I need to know how to be respectful of my husband (since I know it's so important to men) when I don't respect his ways, basically.  What do you think?  A.

Dear A:

Girl, I KNOW exactly what you are feeling and saying. My husband and I are so opposite in our world views and belief systems. I don’t respect many of the choices he makes. It literally grieves my soul. He is very liberal and supports most of the social movements that are in contrast to God’s Word. 

Painful… Hard to respect. I had to stop looking at all that was wrong with him. I actually began to write out lists of the qualities that were admiral and worthy. When you begin to focus on what they do bring into your life and marriage it helps to move past the bitterness. I know I talk about this very thing in our book. It was hard and a long process for me. I’m stubborn. But, through it I’ve saved our marriage and we are both very happy now. And I’m so glad as we are entering into a new season in our life that we stuck with our marriage vows. I love how I just KNOW this man and that he knows me. It’s truly special to have someone know you at that depth of intimacy that they can finish your sentences. 

God healed me first. My healing was enough for the both of us to strive forward and find peace. If God will do this for me, he will do it for you as well. That’s a promise. It all started by my pursuit of God. My increasing love relationship changed everything. For the both of us. My husband still makes decisions about media that grieve me…. But I have peace and I am happy. 

Pray with earnestness to seek God. To know what He is wanting to show you in your life. Start reading every book you can get your hands on about intimacy with the Father. Face to Face with God is really good. It’s on our website. 

I will be your cheerleader and the voice that says ….. YOU CAN DO THIS AND DO IT WELL.

Love you, Lynn

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THRIVE in your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage and raise your children to faith. Our books are filled with practical experience and Biblical advice. -click or tap the photo-

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