Hi My Friends,
I feel like I’ve been away on a long trip. So much has transpired since my last post where I told you I was about to wash my husband’s feet. My daughter’s graduation was amazing and the kid just makes me smile. She graduated with honors, 444 hours of community service, two scholarships and with her sanity and more than that -with her faith still intact. I feel like I graduated as well.
What a rich blessing this thing….. “Motherhood.”
Caitie is my youngest child and I suppose it’s likely true with most moms, when your youngest graduates you spend some time reflecting. And as I think about the fears I faced as a young mother, some of them I shared in the last chapter of Winning Him Without Words, I just want to stand up and shout to the world…. OUR GOD IS FAITHFUL!!! (I shared the whole story here)
I prayed so much for my children throughout their lives and today, this very week, God has allowed me to witness the fruition of my humble motherly prayers. And I’m watching God fulfill them in both my son and my daughter. And they are bearing fruit after years and years in the very same week. I will tell you more about these developments at a later time.
But today, let me tell you what happened when I went to wash my husband’s feet. If you need to read the precursor to the story, click here, Chronicles of a Humbled Donovan.
My husband arrived home tired as I expected and after unpacking, dinner and dawning of our PJ’s, we sat down on the couches in our usual places to watch the evening news. As I’m sitting there pretending to watch the news, I’m growing more and more uncomfortable thinking about actually washing his feet and even more fearful to talk with him about his feelings.
I almost changed my mind.
However, I gathered my courage and God whispered to me, “Lynn, just make this light-hearted.” So I stood up and moved to sit on the other couch next to my husband. I decided as I sat next him and cuddled into his shoulder that the actual washing of feet might be too much. After all, my husband knows a lot about the Bible and how Christ washed the disciple’s feet and more than anything I didn’t want my man to think I'm manipulating him or was practicing some ritual or that I am disingenuous.
I simply picked up one of his feet and said, “I’m just going to rub your feet.” So as we watched the news I removed his socks, rubbed his feet, applied lotion and finally returned him to his socks. Then I became completely uncomfortable. How do I start this conversation? Actually what transpired next was my fumbling about with a few words but I started the sentence.
I paused the news broadcast and then…..
I remember saying something about how I may have withheld a portion of myself out of stupidity and selfishness because of our early years of pain. And that I’m truly sorry. And I asked him, “Do you feel that I haven’t loved you or that you haven’t felt loved in the way you need?”
Let me tell you that asking a question like this takes a ton of courage but I’m in a place with my Lord to receive whatever answer comes because I honestly want to love this man better.
He replied, “No honey, I really feel loved by you.”
Wow, so much better than I expected…….
My friends, I wonder if you are like me? Perhaps we are doing a better job at this marriage thing than we give ourselves credit. After all, we have the Master of the Universe walking every minute with us. Loving us. Teaching us. Loving through us. If God is in our house, then love is lavished upon all that reside there. (1 Corinthians 7:12-14 – read this today and let it fill you up.)
I love you. Now I leave you with a question. Is it time to wash your spouse’s feet?
Have an amazing day living in The Presence. Hugs, Lynn