Hello Everyone. Today I'm interrupting our series to share a story that Sue Tipler sent to me. Sue is part of our amazing community. Take a listen in. I bet all of us can relate to her struggle of this past week. Thanks Sue. Hugs, Lynn
By: Sue Tipler
I felt stuck recently. In fact I felt like I was sinking in quicksand.
Let me explain. Recently my son objected to attending Sunday morning church with me. During this conversation with my son, my husband surprisingly jumped in and supported me. He said to my son, “You made a commitment to God and you need to follow through on it."
My son asked, "Why haven't you made that commitment?" He followed that with "You're probably wondering why I haven't made that commitment."
His response, "We'll talk about that another time but right now you need to go to church".
Wow, that was almost refreshing.
Fast forward to the evening.
My husband took me to dinner while the kids attended Youth Group. After dinner while we were on our way to pick them up he brought up the conversation from the morning and added. "When you stop trying to change me everything will be fine". A few other things were said including an apology for my previous actions; then the killer statement came: "You know I'm too logical to believe."
I dwelled on his statement for days. It compounded the struggle I was already facing; trying to stay in God's Word, meeting the expectations of my leadership position at Bible study, as well as the duties of wife and mother. I wanted to give up! I thought to myself, If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em right?
Finally I wrote a lengthy e-mail to Renee, a Godly friend, who suggested meeting for coffee the next morning; I took her up on it. One of the things she asked me, trying to understand what it’s like to live unequally yoked was, "What is what is an analogy for your marriage and home life? What's it like?”
“It feels like being in quicksand. You don't even realize you're in it until it's too late; and the more you struggle to get out, the deeper you sink in.”
I sink in the miry depths,
where there is no foothold.
I have come into the deep waters;
the floods engulf me. (Psalm 69:2)
“I need a big stick to pull me out and for me it's my Bible study and Christian friends; but when my husband gets home it's like the stick gets covered in oil and I can't hang on.”
Renee gave me some encouragement in addition to her response to my e-mail the day before, and asked me to do some research on quicksand to see if there's anything spiritual there. So I did. I learned some things and God spoke to me.
Secondly, it's true that if you struggle and thrash around you'll only sink deeper.
Third, How do you escape the mire? Relax, move slowly, look up and let the quicksand move you into a floating position.
So what was God trying to say to me in this seemingly benign information? First, God will not let you sink so far you can’t get out. He will rescue you.
Rescue me from the mire,
do not let me sink (Psalm 69:14a)
Second, if you struggle and thrash around you will sink deeper (remember Peter when he tried to walk on water on his own?). Third: How to escape? Relax, look Up, and let God put you in a position to be floating on top of the situation instead of being mired in it.
I didn’t need a stick. I only need Him.
Even if you don’t see anything happening in your husband’s life, you can relax:
Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord,
I will be joyful in God my Savior. (Habakkuk 3:17-18)
…fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:2)
Let God move you to be over the situation instead of mired in it:
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (Romans 12:11-12)
And, Oh by the way:
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
We’re all in this together, my friends.
Blessings and hugs,
Hi, my name is Sue Tipler. I'm from mid-Michigan and have been part of the SUM community for about two years. I've been married to my wonderful husband for almost 28 years and we have two beautiful children: a daughter who's a Freshman in high school and a son who's a 6th-grader in Middle School. I've been struggling with my "spiritually single" status for the majority of our marriage, but never more than in the last 10 years or so. Thanks to an area Bible Study I've been getting closer to the Lord, but my husband has not. I can see God working, but my husband swears he’s "too logical" to believe. He is supportive of me and the children's involvement in church but he wants no part of it. Although I don't visit the SUM website as often as I'd like it is a beacon of light when things get dark.
Share your voice, heart and love in the comments.
Lynn has wonderfully mapped out the steps we all need to walk through to develop and grow this vital relationship with Him. This was the Lord’s intent for her transformation journey all along, and His intent for you too. Here she has spelled out the spiritual truths behind the principles and talked us through how she applied them. These truths are universally applicable to us all, though as the details of our lives, situations and hearts will be different, we will apply them differently. - Reader Review from Barnes & Noble.