A Shaghetti Western
Marriage Monday
April 06, 2009
e-Mom of Chrysalis Is hosting Marriage Monday.
Our topic: "Friendship in Christian Marriage." How do you and your husband celebrate your friendship together. Scripture teaches us to phileo our husbands (Titus 2:4). This is a human brotherly kind of affection and love. For most men, phileo translates into side-by-side companionship. What do you two love to do together that fosters good feelings between you?
Hop over to Chrysalis to read more Marriage Monday.
I have spent a number of hours thinking about this topic. Friendship is a word that can encapsulate a vast number of meanings. I couldn’t put my finger on exactly what defines a friendship. It can change over time. Friendships differ with each individual.
So, of course, I asked my man. “How would you describe our married friendship?”
Now, I need to tell you that asking my man this question, this particular week, was dangerous.
Most of you know that on Wednesday I will be a speaker at A Woman Inspired. I will be speaking about Marriage. What you may not know is that every time I prepare to speak about this topic, my marriage becomes victim of attack. The enemy wants nothing more than to destroy our “uniquely yoked” marriage.
With this said, you can bet there has been some “tension” in our relationship last week. However, we survived the crankiness, okay, my crankiness… *grin* The Lord is faithful indeed and His angels stood guard over our home and marriage.
Back to the story. I asked my husband, “How would you describe our friendship?”
He was standing next to me and shot me a sideways glance. Girls, you know this look. This is where he is afraid to answer. Sort of like when we ask him, “Do I look fat?” ~Deer in headlights!
I started to grin, then the hilarity of the situation got the best of me and I busted out in giggles. He was grinning too. I KNEW what he was thinking.
I turned to face him smiling, ear-to-ear, “You think married friendship is like an old Clint Eastwood movie, The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. Don’t you.” queue: whistle -- (woo-eee, woo-eee, woooo...wah, wha wha)
I could tell by the look on his face I was exactly right. I said, “You have only seen the bad and the ugly lately, right?” He just smiled.
Oh, girls I grabbed that man and hugged him with vigor. He puts up with an awful lot at times.
This exchange is what married friendship is all about. I can be bad, I am often ugly, and he still loves me. I am safe to be the authentic me, good, bad, ugly. He is safe to be the same.
I can’t leave God out of this equation because without the life-changing power at work in me as well as working in and around my unbelieving spouse, our marriage would not be a safe place to land.
Our marriage mostly lives in the “good” part of that old Spaghetti Western. But on those days when the bad and ugly are present, we know our friendship will triumph because it is deep, lasting and honest. Our life-long friendship is rich because the Lord is alive and well in the midst of the Donovan home.
Be blessed, Lynn
