It’s time to take your pulse.
All of God’s children are born with personality, traits, and abilities which are unique. However, attitudes and perceptions are what we develop in our childhood. Attitudes and perceptions we can change as an adult.
Think about your family of origin and your family of today.
Was your family:
Supportive or aloof
Encouraging or discouraging
Warm or cold
Close or Distant
Real or Phony
Helpful or Critical
Open or Closed
Unified or Divided
Affectionate or Unaffectionate
Do you see any patterns here? Patterns in your family of origin or of today? Do you like your family of today?
Okay here is the hard part. How brave are you? If you dare to do it, your children are old enough to understand, and you are mature enough to handle their answers, try talking about their perceptions of what it’s like in your family. You may be encouraged or you may be warned about problems.
Take out your prayer journal and talk to God about your family of your childhood. Now ask Him to show you where the old ways were not good ways. Write out your prayer asking for God’s hand to help you change problem areas.
Ask God for strength and courage to broach this subject with your spouse. Bring the above questions to God. Ask Him to help you bring the questions to your spouse. This single exercise could start your relationship on a road of healing.
If you spouse is completely unresponsive or unwilling to participate, TAKE HEART. God is right beside you comforting you now in this lonely season. He will not leave you there forever. Also, think about what you may be doing to help your children learn a different attitude and perception about love and their future married relationship.
1"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me.
Be blessed, Lynn
Next Up: The Stupid Thing People Do