Conflict In Marriage - I Bet You Didn't Know THIS EITHER
On Friday I shared a story about how the enemy twists words in our marriage conflicts. Geeze, when I heard this it really made me mad. I can just imagine in the early years of my marriage how this could have and likely DID happen in our home. But what makes me even madder is the story I’m going to share with you today. Now my friends, I hope you get mad too. Because today we are about to reveal a tactic of the enemy he uses against us in marriage conflict. And as of today this ploy of evil will no longer hold power over us.
In my discussion with friends about marriage conflict we talked about another way the enemy comes in to wreck your day. What I’d never considered is how the enemy will perpetuate anger. And you know why he will work so hard to do this? TO WASTE OUR TIME.
Man, this really bugs me because I KNOW it’s happened to me. For example, Mike and I get into a discussion fight in the morning hours. Or let me be really pointed. It’s on a Sunday morning when I’m preparing to go to church alone – again alone. And on top of things my husband says something to me before I leave which is probably carless on his part but really gets my anger going. I choose not to have it out with him right before leaving for church. I go to church and in the back of my mind, I’M MAD. And that little seed of anger or resentment grows. But it explodes when I get in my car to return home. Now I’m madder when I arrive home and he's still in his PJs. I’m mad I went to church alone. I’m mad that he said something stupid earlier which by now I’ve completely blown out of proportion in my thoughts.
Arriving home, I’m so ticked off I can’t even talk to the guy. I’m mad he doesn’t even know I’m mad which make me madder… I’m plain MAD… (Geeze)
Please tell me that I’m not alone in this. I guess I need to know I’m not the only one to whom this has happened.
Well on a typical Sunday if I was mad, I would go outside and work for hours in my garden. And that reel of angry words (actual or made up in my mind) continues to replay in my mind. Over and over… Over and over. I end up fuming mad all day long. Mumbling under my breath as I dig weeds.
Okay, this is what is really happening. The enemy is whispering those words over and over in my head, feeding my anger. And do you know why? I’ve wasted a full day. An entire day passes and it’s wasted in useless anger. It’s a disruption to our marriage and a disaster to my spirit.
My friends, to win this battle is quite simple. It’s recognizing it. Just realize what is going on and that this anger that is boiling for hours is feed by evil because it wants to waste your time. So recognize it and rebuke it. Don’t agree to be angry. Take your thoughts captive to Christ. Sometimes I have to repeat over and over in prayer, "I take that thought captive to Christ. It will not consume my mind. In Jesus name."
Next, when you can’t come into an agreement or restoration with your spouse in an area of conflict, give it over to the Holy Spirit. Pray and ask in the power and authority for the Holy Spirit to take your anger and your impasse to an end or at least to bring peace into your marriage. It’s amazing what happens when we release the Holy Spirit into our midst. It changes the atmosphere.
Finally my friends, many of you NEED to hear this truth:
We serve the God of hope. We may think our marriage is always going to be this way. But it won’t. We serve a God of Faith, hope and love. Things will change. They will. How do I know this? Because He has changed my ordinary, everyday marriage. And if He will do this for me, God will do it for you. Pray, trust, believe and then receive.
Okay, has this scenario played out in your marriage?
I love you. And I have one thing more to say.
Jesus said, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.”
Amen…. Amen…. AMEN……