The "Right" Prayer

I do not believe that there is such a thing in the history of God's kingdom as a right prayer offered in a right spirit that is forever left unanswered. — Theodore L. Cuyler

Theodore L. Cuyler's words ring true when held up against the light of God's Word:

Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. — James 5:14-16

Mind you, that's not our righteousness, but the righteousness of Christ that we receive through his saving blood. But go back a moment to Cuyler's words, which speak of a right spirit. This is different than the righteousness of Christ. He's speaking of our motivation.

No matter how we might couch our words to those around us and even to God, he sees the motivation of our hearts. If we come to God in prayer for our unsaved loved ones, asking for their salvation in order to suit our own needs, then our motivation is off, and we aren't praying in a "right spirit." That doesn't mean God will prevent our loved one from coming to Christ, but we know God is perfect in his timing. He won't allow something to pass if the circumstances aren't the way He wants them.

What I'm saying here is this. That until we can pray for our spouses out of pure motivation—from a selfless love and desire to see them know our amazing God and all the extraordinary knowledge, peace, understanding, forgiveness, and completeness that comes with it—we, the believing spouses, are the ones God will work on first.

We cannot change our spouses, but we can influence them. Thus God will work in us to change and mold our hearts and character to make us the kind of influence God wants in our spouses lives. God will create us to be whatever tool necessary in instrumenting a change in our loves ones live. And though we are changed, we are still merely the tool, wielded by the great Carpenter.

Herein lies the key to what Lynn and I call thriving in our spiritually unequal marriages. It is not we who are attempting to change our spouses, but God in us, given free reign through our obedience to do whatever is necessary.

Praying and believing,
Dineen

Comments

[Lynn]

Oh Deineen,

This is so well written and absolutely true. I think for many years I was praying out of selfish desire. God had a ton of work to do in me. I honestly now only want my husband to come to salvation just so he can know Christ. I just want him to know the Lord and have the kind of peace and acceptance and love that I know to be true.

Excellent... Excellent.... Thank you for these words and your love for Jesus and for your spouse. Hugs. Have a wonderful day.

[Denise]

Amen.

[Debbie]

How true this is! Of course, I want my husband to become a believer so I don't have to go to church alone and we can have those wonderful spiritual discussions I dream about. BUT ... what I really care about is my husband's eternal destiny; because I love him.

[Amy]

yes very true! I know that in all the hard times I've had with my husband, God's used it to change me.

[Noreen]

Phenomenal post dear one!!!!So true, may our hearts be pure before our Lord as we pray-so that He can accomplish His will, in our lives and the lives of our spouses.
Hugs to you.
Noreen

[Laurie Ann]

Absolutely wonderful post! God bless you for sharing your heart of wisdom and love with us.

[Tamara]

good morning dineen, first I read your post about Leslie and thank the Lord she is doing better and you can have a rest period at home! I am very thankful to the Lord that he gives your family a rest period. I too believe our motives we cant hide from the Lord and I dont. smile - I used to pray always for Jacks salvation that "we as a couple" have it easier. Today I thank the Lord and always pray for his repentance and born-again-through the spirit birth for the following motives: first for his salvation and spritual freedom here on earth and secondly/thirdly for our marriage and for our children. I come from a christian home so I know what I am missing as a wife and what the children are missing - I dont hide that at all from the Lord and of course the Lord knows it best - he warns about marrying unequally yoked spouses. We are having a very spiritual time here, I find Jacks bible opened in different spots in our bath- and bedroom so I know he is reading on the "hide" which is a huge thing and I am very excited so I can pray very peacefully and with a burning heart for his salvation. I admit though, when he goes out and "loves" worldly things and I am alone with the children I always also pray: Dear Lord you see our situation and it is pitiful, touch Jack that he sees what is truly wonderful and fun and loving and that is You. I pray that for Jack but also always for us as a family and I dont believe that is wrong at all. hugs and love Tamara

[Dineen Miller]

I agree, Tamara. Your first motivation is right on target. That's what matters most. And how awesome that Jack is reading the Bible! Wow, that's God in action. Alone we can't read and understand it. That's amazing!

[Heather]

How true it is that we have to be in the "right spirit" while praying... while at the same time our Father will still hear us even through selfish desires. And YES - His timing is all that matters. We do need to step back and allow Jesus to continue to work in us... helping the spouse to see the change and want it too.

Thanks for sharing & Blessings too, HL